Huh

I referred to myself as a 'teenager on the brink of adult-ness' in my first post.

I referred to myself as an adult in my recent blog post about clean checks.

I hadn't realized I had started thinking of myself as an adult. It's an interesting thought. I wonder when exactly I decided I was no longer a kid? I suppose it has come over me gradually as I've dealt with the more adult aspect of college life.

Lovely Weekend

My loverly parents came up to Idaho this weekend!

Daddy came and picked me up Saturday afternoon and took me to Idaho Falls, where we picked up Mom from their hotel and went to dinner. Outback Steakhouse - holy cow. Amazing food. *drools thinking about it*

*snaps out of it*

Sorry. College student here. We don't get amazing, delicious, expensive food very often.

Then, when we were done, we went back to their hotel and changed into pretty clothes for Chris and Keira's second reception. Since Keira is from Idaho, they had another one here for all the Idahoans who wouldn't get to go to the one in Salt Lake.

After the reception, we went back to the hotel and changed again (this time into my favorite pair of pajamas [same pjs in the pictures], which Mommy and Daddy were nice enough to bring me after I left them at home like a sillyhead). Then Daddy brought me back to my dorm. I would've stayed in their hotel room - I was pretty tired - but I had left all my clothes and makeup and everything here. My roommates had gone shopping via my friend's Mark car, and he was still at our dorm, so he and my Dad got to meet then.

The next day Mom and Dad were going to make my dorm dinner and I had invited Aretha and Mark as well, so Mom, Dad, and Mark came to our ward (Mark's ward meets during the time we were going to eat). I sang a duet with a guy from my ward named Paul during Sacrament, and after Sacrament, Daddy went back to the dorm to start dinner cooking and Mom and Mark tagged along to Sunday School and RS/Priesthood.

After church we had ward choir. Mom went back to the dorm to wait and help Dad finish up the food. Choir was fun - we're singing next week and the guys finally seem to know their part! - and then we all crowded into the car to go back to our dorm... except Mark, who walked Aretha's roommate Rachel home, because she didn't want to squish in with the rest of us.

Then... we ate. And ATE.

You must understand, Sunday dinner is usually quite boring. But this dinner was lasagna and salad and pasta salad and garlic bread and soda and... Yum. Food. Real food.

Before Mommy and Daddy left, Aretha asked Lindsey to take a few pictures of us all on her phone (so that is where my pictures in this post come from).

From left to right: Jessy, Stephanie, Aretha, Me, Daddy, Mommy, Mark.

Silly us!

After Mom and Dad left, we all played a round of In a Pickle then Mark left and I took a lovely nap. After my nap, I got to talk with my wonderful bestie Jessica on the phone for awhile. That was nice; I've missed her.

And that is my wonderful weekend in a nutshell.

Oh! And also, Mom and Dad offered to drive up and bring us all down for General Conference, and I think we'll actually do it. That'll be cool. I may live half an hour from the Conference center, but I've still only actually gone in person either once or twice (I can't remember) in my life. My roommates are all very excited about it.

Expectations

Throughout my life, people I have trusted and respected have put me under certain expectations, which I have tried very hard to fulfill. They called me smart, so I tried to be smart. They called me creative, so I tried to be creative. They called me sweet, loyal, a good girl, trustworthy, talented, and so I tried my very best to be so. I have a weakness for wanting to live up to what people think of me -- I think most of us do. I didn't, and still don't, like letting people down.

I'm very lucky that people have thought and expected the best of me, therefore encouraging me to be my best. There are people in this world who have little expected of them and are thought to be less than they are. Unfortunately, they too tend to live up to the expectations had of them, or rather, they live down to those expectations.

Now that I'm older, I have expectations of myself. Among other things, I expect myself to do well in school, I expect myself to keep my belongings tidy, I expect myself to keep my word and I expect myself to be responsible for the things put under my responsibility. I am more disappointed when I fail myself than I ever was when I disappointed everyone else.

So you'll understand why it bothers me that, after having signed a contract saying I would maintain my dorm, my dorm managers feel it necessary to have clean checks every week.

To me, this lack of expectations -- or maybe it would be better to say this over-abundance of bad expectations -- is offensive. They expect me to be an average, sloppy college kid, unwilling to do any cleaning unless it is under the threat of failing clean check. I can be and am responsible; I can and do keep my own dorm clean without micromanagement; I said I would do so when I signed my contract, and I can, will, and do keep my word. Having someone come poking their nose around my dorm every week feels like a slap in the face of my personal expectations.

As a kid, there was nothing that bothered me more than someone thinking I was lying when I wasn't. As an adult, it is still probably one of the most obnoxious things I deal with. I wasn't lying when I said I would take care of my dorm, and these constant clean checks show very little faith in my integrity.

It stings.

I could say a lot more, both on the subject of expectations and clean checks, but I'll leave it at that for now. I have homework to do -- homework for which I am responsible and therefore will do.

This Week

...has been crazy. I started getting sick with chills and fevers last Saturday. By Sunday morning, I felt terrible, so I stayed home from church. There was a CES fireside with Elder Cook here that evening that I was required to sing at for Choir, so I had to get up for that eventually. By the next day, my sickness had morphed from really bad chills to a sore throat/cough/runny-stuffy nose, which was much better for attending classes (can you imagine me sitting in classes with the chills?) but still no fun.

Tuesday, we sang for devotional, (I, uh, haha, actually almost fainted during the practice we had just before devo, it was scary) and then that night we had a big performance rehearsal, which, gratefully, I didn't have to do any singing for, for most of it. They were videoing it, and the video was to be back up footage for the performance here on Friday, but I wasn't going to be there, so obviously they couldn't have someone in the backup footage and not in the real stuff, so I got to sit in the audience seats and listen. Our Sacred Music Project oratorio is really gorgeous this year. Sitting and listening was such a wonderful experience.

Wednesday was a brief respite from the crazy, then Thursday, I got up, went to my first two classes, cleaned, packed, and got on a bus for Pocatello with the choir. We had a performance there at this really cool building that I think is owned by ISU. This building looked like something out of Star Wars. It was probably three stories tall, but there was only the one floor, with enormously tall ceilings, and long, long, long windows and a windowed dome at the top. Really cool.

Then, afterward, while everyone else climbed back on the buses to go back to Rexburg, I met up with my new sister in law's sisters, Camilla and Mileah, and we drove the rest of the way to Salt Lake. They took me to Chris's house, where Jared, who stayed at my parents' house for the wedding, was waiting to take me home. It was nice to get to hang out with my big brothers for a bit before we had to get home.

The next day was surprisingly chill for a wedding day. I woke up when I was done sleeping, took a shower and got ready, then drove in to the temple with my sister, Gwen, and her family. Her mother in law (who was in town for my nephew Ethan's birthday) and I watched her kids while they were in the wedding.

I got to hold Ashland most of the time, but she started crying about half way through and I just couldn't get her to stop, and Tyler, Ethan and Lynn, Gwen's mother in law, had gone off on a walk together. That bit was stressful. I didn't know what to do. She'd fussed a little bit a few other times, but calmed right down when I'd pointed out flowers or let her touch trees or given her a cracker or something. None of that worked that time. I was starting to panic when, thankfully, nephews and mother in law came back. Those boys are such good big brothers to Ashland. It was so sweet how concerned they were when they came running around the corner because they'd heard her crying.

Lynn had the good idea to try putting her in her stroller and walking around, and she stopped crying soon enough. I'm not sure whether that was due more to the movement of the stroller (which Tyler pushed) or her distraction (Ethan, walking backwards in front of the stroller, making funny faces and dancing around). Those boys really are adorable brothers to that baby girl. We little sisters are so lucky/blessed!

Then the wedding was over and we all cheered as Chris and Keira came out. They are so cute together. I'm so happy for them! I've been waiting for Chris to find the right girl, and to be happy, for years. And now he has and he is. It makes me smile just to think about how happy he is.

We headed over to the chapel after that and helped set up for the family/friends luncheon, then had the luncheon, then, since Mom wasn't feeling good (funnily enough, she got sick just a few days after me and was still going through the chills) we went and took a break at Chris's house for half an hour or so. Then it was time to get back for pictures and then the reception. It's odd, being the groom's family, nobody told me what I should do with myself, so I just hung out by the table where they had a slideshow of Chris and Keira's lives going on a dvd and kept pressing play every time it got over. Also, I told people coming in where to put their presents. Small contributions, but hey, I was helping, right?

Eventually, Chris and Keira drove off in a toilet paper and shaving cream covered car and we cleaned up the church before going home with several dozen extra sandwiches and boxes and boxes of cookies.

The next day I hung out with my Daddy a bit then went up to Gwen's house to catch a bit of Ethan's birthday party. It was mad scientist themed, and they had bottles of water and dry ice on the table that smoked and looked really neat. I was only able to stay for about half and hour, though, before I had to go to Salt Lake. The choir had taken buses down here for a concert in the tabernacle and I needed to be at our first rehearsal.

After we were done rehearsing, we ate dinner in a cafeteria under the church office building. We got to it through the underground tunnel system -- it was so cool! Then we all got dressed in our performance outfits, practiced a bit, and went up into the tabernacle to sing. I didn't mention before that I didn't actually sing in any of our other performances, did I? My voice wouldn't cooperate, what with being sick and all. But last night I was finally feeling well enough that I sang everything but the highest notes. The only downside was that it made me have to cough a couple times in the middle of songs, but hopefully no one noticed.

After the concert we changed into travel clothes and I got to say goodbye to my Daddy and Jared, who'd come to watch my performance, before getting on the bus for the long ride back here.

We finally got here a bit past one in the morning (this is pre-time change time). I waited up for my roommate, Stephanie, who also went to Utah for the weekend, to go with her boyfriend to his old companion's reception. By the time I went to bed, with the time change, it was 3:30 am. I've already missed three weeks of church this semester, twice from going home and once because I was sick, and I didn't want to miss anymore, so I pulled myself out of bed at 8:30 this morning, five hours after going to sleep, to get ready for church.

Our lessons were nice, then afterwards we had choir practice and I practiced a duet which I'll be singing next week. Afterwards, I came home, ate some Ramen, and took a nice long nap.

Which has us caught up to now. Busy week, right?

Things

Sorry, I'm tired and sick, so not much to say.

I saved Stephanie's life the other day. It's true. I did. I forgot to mention it in the other post. We were walking together and a car would've run her over, but I grabbed her and pulled her out of the way. Super Lisa moment.

Another thing, Choir has been taking over my life recently, and I don't especially appreciate it.

Third thing, I'm sick. I said that already, but it deserves to be repeated.

Fourth thing, MY BROTHER IS GETTING MARRIED THIS WEEK. YAY! I am so excited, guys. You have no idea.

Fifth thing, there's this guy who keeps coming to our apartment and making us brownies. *waggles eyebrows* There's also more to the story than that, but I'm not going into details right here, right now. Ask me some other time.

Sixth thing, I am SO EXCITED FOR CHRIS'S WEDDING. What? I already said that? Well, who cares! I'm doubly excited!

Seventh thing, I should not write blog posts when tired/sick. I am oddly loopy.

Eighth thing... There is no eighth thing in my mind right now.

The End.

Edit: WAIT. I remembered. I wanted to go on a bit about how sweet my friends are. Stephanie has been my mother hen the whole time I've been sick, Aretha brought me food today, Lindsey arranged for the home teachers to come give me a blessing, and Jessy has told me not to die every time I've coughed/shivered/appeared ill. Aren't they lovely?

Now that is all.